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Male Ejaculation

HTHGS: Painful male ejaculation (written by Shan&Claude)

Ask Shan & Claude,
 My boyfriend and I have been talking about our past sex lives, and one of the things that came up in conversation is that when ever he ejaculates his legs either lock or cramp and it is extremely painful for him.  I was wondering if there is anything that we can do to lessen this.  From what he says the cramping occurs mostly at night or when he's tired.  He says it doesn't happen as often when he's masturbating, the cramping usually only occurs during sex.  I really hope you can help us.     Christine

Dear Christine,
We are sorry it took so long to respond to your question.  It took a little research and investigation!  We have heard of this condition in athletes. The leg cramps can be accredited to a variety of factors.  The cramps may be a result of being in the same position for a long period of time.  If that is the case you may want to experiment with different positions (you on top and so forth).  You may want to investigate how he masturbates (the position or positions) to determine if you could implement some of those positions into your current experiences to try to avoid the cramping.  Aspirin contains antiprostoglandins. Because of this, aspirin is supposed to reduce cramping in menstrual women.  Perhaps it could have the same “cramp reducing” properties in your partner?

From an athletic point of view some people belief that leg cramping, particularly at night, may be the result of low electrolytes or low potassium after the body experiences a workout.  The electrolytes could be replaced with a sports drink, a banana, or other products that contain similar replacement fluids.  If the problem persists, or if you choose to take the aspirin, we always recommend that you speak with your healthcare provider or medical professional first!  If you implement changing positions, sports drinks, and bananas into your sexual play all at the same time you could have quite an amazing scene!  Hope that helps your partner’s leg cramps and help you both have a lot of fun!  
Pleasurably, Shan & Claude Colestock

This tip was originally written by Shan & Claude Colestock

HTHGS: Premature Ejaculation (written by Shan&Claude)

Ask Shan & Claude,
This is Jasbir from Bramptom Canada. Actually I have a problem. Whenever we I and my b/f haves sex he ejaculates early and I am left unsatisfied due to lack of penetration though he eats me out but the desire to get IT remains , we have tried 2-3 times and now we are going together married soon. I hope you will answer and help me thanks Jasbir

Dear Jasbir (from Canada),
What you have described is quite common.  However, not everyone seeks help! We are glad that you are investigating how to get your needs met.  There are many things a couple can do to help prolong intercourse or pleasure.  There are sexual toys - if it is the penetration that you enjoy.  There are actually a variety of sexual toys that you may enjoy!  Check out goodvibes.com or attend a session on these issues at our howtohavegoodsex.com website!  There are physical techniques that you can practice, separate or together, that can help prolong or postpone his orgasm.  There are books written on it and websites.  Most involve the man practicing and rehearsing how to hold-off orgasm.  Some techniques include stopping and relaxing just before orgasm while others involve squeezing the tip of the penis to halt orgasm and “last longer.”  We recommend that you seek a more detailed book or website on sexual techniques.

May we ask you a question?  Does he know how you feel?  Does he know your needs?  Have you explained your situation to him?  The best part of being able to communicate about these issues is that you will have fun practicing how to reduce or illuminate the problem!  We encourage you to tell him exactly what you have told us (if you already haven’t). May you enjoy every minute of your learning,
Shan & Claude Colestock

If you want more sex tips written by other sexperts . . . 

Ejaculation Orgasm The G-spot
Male Ejaculation The Male Orgasm Locating the Male G-spot
Female Ejaculation The Female Orgasm  Locating the Female G-spot
 

 

 

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The Founder: "Alex" Caroline Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS

Ms. Robboy is the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of The Center for Growth Inc and How To Have Good Sex Inc.  Alex practices marriage and family therapy and sex therapy, and also conducts periodic seminars about human sexuality throughout the northeastern United States.

Ms. Robboy graduated from the University of Pennsylvania where she earned a Masters degree in Social Work, a Certificate of Advanced Studies in Human Sexuality Education and a Post-Masters Certificate in Marriage Counseling & Sex Therapy. Through the American Board of Sexology, she is a board certified sexologist and through the American Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists a certified sex therapist.  Additionally, she is a licensed clinical social worker and a member of the American Board of Marriage and Family Therapy.

 

  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to alex@howtohavegoodsex.com and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 
                                                                                    

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