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Past Tips


(How to have good sex)

  • Nervous about receiving fellatio (Written by Kelly Connell, MS.Ed.)

  • Oral Sex (written by Kelly Connell MS.Ed.) 

  • Male Ejaculation ME

  • Female Ejaculation FE

  • The Male Orgasm TMO

  • The Female Orgasm TFO 

  • Locating the Male G-Spot MG-Spot

  • Locating the Female G-Spot FG-spot

HTHGS: Nervous about receiving fellatio (Written by Kelly Connell, MS.Ed.)

Ask Kelly,
Hey I am going to get oral sex for the first time tomorrow, possibly sex, but Iím kind of nervous because what if my partner does not think my penis is big? Iím also nervous because what if I cant get erect or I do not ejaculate while having oral sex? could you help me out, thanks

 Penis size has nothing to do with pleasurable oral sex.  Some people find a large penis intimidating when performing oral sex. There are afraid they cannot get it all in their mouth.  Any partner who comments that your penis is not big enough would, in my opinion, be pretty shallow and you might want to re-evaluate whether or not you want to be with this person. We all have something about our bodies that we don't like and can't change and we all have to work with what nature gave s.  It is not the size, but what you do with what you have.

 If you can't get erect right away, relax and try kissing or making out or doing something that has previously made you hard. If the person who is performing oral sex on you continues to do so, eventually you will ejaculate.  You may have to stop for a while and have some manual stimulation and then go back to oral sex and that is ok too. Some people use oral sex as a method of foreplay for coming some other way. You don't have to come every time you have oral sex.

Try to relax and enjoy it and remember, it can only get better the more you do it and your partner learns what pleases you. experimenting can be fun.

Good luck Kelly Connell MS.Ed.


HTHGS: Oral Sex (written by Kelly Connell MS.Ed.)

Ask Kelly,
Thanks for reading: I wouldn't consider this a "problem" or anything, but I think because of my girlfriends lack of experience possibly or for whatever other reason, she seems to not go 'directly on the penis', like my diagram below (sorry, my English isn't amazing, so I will use my "picture like diagram") 8======> & What I guess I consider normal, she would go down and up on the penis (imagining that the "&" is her mouth. 8======> & She seems to always go from the sides, and other things like that. I've tried everything, and I can't think of any solution... Please save me and thank you, -FeJ

Dear Fej,
You say you have tried everything, but have you tried TALKING to her and telling her what you would like?  Sometimes you have to come right out and say that something would feel good or you would like to try it a certain way. Communication is the key to a good sex life. Another thing you might try is to rent an erotic video that features oral sex and watch it together and if you see something in the video you would like, tell her you would like to try it like that. Visual aids can be a big help! Good luck, Kelly Connell MS.Ed.


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The Founder: "Alex" Caroline Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS
"Alex" Caroline Robboy is a certified sex therapist through the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists and an American Board Certified Sexologist. In addition, she is a clinical member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists and a member of the North American Society for Psychological Obstetrics and Gynecology.


  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 

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