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HTHGS: Love Bites
                Kissing Techniques

Love Bites
The first thing you need to do is take a deep breath and relax. The key to success is communication. By this I mean, there is no 'one' correct way to give an erotic love bite. People like different things. I realize this does not sound very informative, but it really is. While giving an erotic love bite pay attention to your partners responsiveness. She may respond verbally and/or non-verbally. Her heart beat may quicken, she may moan, get goose bumps or say something like "that's such a turn on". Either way, pay attention. Each woman will respond differently and it is important to find out what she likes. No two women will respond the same way. In fact, the same woman may respond differently to the same bite based on her mood/level of excitement.

Some things you may want to try:

  • Nibble on her neck, (the same motions as if you were nibbling on a piece of chocolate - and wanted to make it last as long as possible)
  • Suck on her neck, (the same motions as if you were sucking on a popsicle.
  • Gently hold a little bit of her skin between your front teeth and roll it back and forth. For variation, place your lips on the skin while doing this
  • Bite her, just enough to leave teeth marks (practice first on your own skin)
  • Suck on her skin, just enough to leave a red mark (practice first on your own skin)
  • Caress her skin with your tongue, while pulling on her skin with your lips
  • Rub your teeth up and down on her skin, as if you were constantly trying to bite her, but never quite being able to actually grab her skin
  • Try giving her the same type of love bite on all the different parts of her body, including her breasts, nipples, inner thigh, cheek, and earlobe

If you are feeling adventurous, try experimenting with different tongue and mouth positions (wide, oval, hard, soft etc). If you feel nervous, practice on your arm. This will help you learn how to gauge your strength.

One KEY aspect to seduction / invitation is making your partner feel special. Your partner needs to feel that she/he is the only person that you have eyes on. She/he is not simply a mere body, or a replacement object, but there is some magical quality about her/him, which makes you go wild. This sensation of special-ness lends itself to feeling confident and secure. Feeling confident and secure in a relationship are important building blocks to a thriving sexual life.

How to make a woman (or man) feel special:

  • Tell her what a good time you had with her when you (ate dinner, hung out at the bar, went bike riding, studied together, walked along the beach, camped, visited her at the hospital ….)
  • Tell her that when you were at work (or home, or with buddies) you found yourself talking about her with your peers, telling them all about whatever the two of you most recently did together.
  • Give her a poem that you wrote while thinking about her.
  • Leave a message on her answering machine when she is not home letting her know how much you enjoyed hanging out with her.
  • Write her a letter and mail it to her.
  • Compliment her on something that she put effort into (I really liked the restaurant that you chose for us to go out to, the meal you cooked was amazing, that dress is extremely flattering, I really like the way you wear your make-up, the way you handled that situation at work was professional, that's an excellent paper - your ideas are not only well written, but well thought out).
  •  I was thinking about the other night when we made love. It felt intense. I felt very connected to you.
  • I was imagining today at work touching your breasts and caressing your nipples with my lips. They tasted so good last week. I like it when you are slightly salty from working out. I can not wait to touch you again.
  • The way you touch me, makes me feel extremely special. I like the way you give me oral sex. It makes me feel all tingly inside.

Tips written by Alex Robboy, LSW

 

 

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The Founder: "Alex" Caroline Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS

Ms. Robboy is the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of The Center for Growth Inc and How To Have Good Sex Inc.  Alex practices marriage and family therapy and sex therapy, and also conducts periodic seminars about human sexuality throughout the northeastern United States.

Ms. Robboy graduated from the University of Pennsylvania where she earned a Masters degree in Social Work, a Certificate of Advanced Studies in Human Sexuality Education and a Post-Masters Certificate in Marriage Counseling & Sex Therapy. Through the American Board of Sexology, she is a board certified sexologist and through the American Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists a certified sex therapist.  Additionally, she is a licensed clinical social worker and a member of the American Board of Marriage and Family Therapy.

 

  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to alex@howtohavegoodsex.com and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 
                                                                                    

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