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How
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Past Tips |
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Flaccid
Penis
HTHGS:
Flaccid Penis
Ask
Alex,
Okay, this is hard for me to talk about and I haven't confronted anyone else
about it because I believe it to be embarrassing. Well, just recently, someone
who I love completely we're kissing and eventually it had lead to..well..."more
than that." And well, just about as we were getting into it, I noticed that
I was not fully erect. And well, the whole time we we're getting into it, it
never reached the point when it was ready for penetration, it was a little short
of it. So after a while, we stop trying, and then we started all over again a
few minutes later, and disappointingly enough, again, it did not happen. We
stopped once more, and then finally we tried a third time, and again it didn't
happen. My loved one says not to worry, and we've been together for a while, but
why is it that when we finally reached this new stage that "it" failed
on me. I'm embarrassed and confused, can you please give any explanations as to
why this has happened. And by the way I'm far from being 40 and I hope it's not
impotence. I'm still at a young age, and lately I've been thinking of having
children after we are married, but I've become concerned from this situation.
Any answers?
Dear
Any Answers,
First, take a deep breath
and relax. Your problem is quite common. The cause of the difficulty that you
are experiencing is most likely from anxiety, nervousness, embarrassment,
shyness, excitement and/or a desire to please.
Expect that you will have problems getting / maintaining an erection for
several dates. If you have problems
maintaining an erection during masturbation, and / or never have an erection
during your sleep it is a strong indication that you are having difficulty due
to a medical problem. If that is the situation, you will need to make an
appointment with an urologist who will be able to assist you.
Given your description it sounds to me as if you simply need to RELAX,
stop worrying, learn to laugh at yourself and have a good time. The key to being
a good lover is to stop putting so much pressure on yourself or your partner to
perform. There is more to good sex
than an erect penis.
This
tip was originally written by Alex Robboy, LSW
HTHGS:
Hard as rocks
Ask
Alex,
I subscribe to your newsletter and really appreciate the articles you publish.
I learnt most of what I know about sex through you - 8 weeks ago I made
love to a woman for the first time and she couldn’t believe it was my first
time! That is how effective your newsletter has been for me. Thank
you!
I'm
24yrs old. I think I have a problem and would appreciate any feedback you
can give me. In short, my problem is that I cannot get a really hard
erection during the day or at night. When I wake up in the mornings, my
penis is as hard as a rock and stands up real stiff, and sex at that time is
just fantastic for myself and my girlfriend. But at other times, it just
doesn’t harden up well. My girlfriend gives me a hand job and I come,
but my penis isn’t hard enough for intercourse. Oral sex is great, but I
want to know why I cannot maintain an erection at times other than first thing
in the morning. Is there any exercise I can do? Any supplements I
can take? Anything? Please let me know. Thank you, Yours Sincerely, Mark
Dear
Mark,
Thank you for the compliment. I am glad to hear that our website http://www.howtohavegoodsex.com
has been helpful.
In
response to your question, you should make an appointment with your urologist to
have all potential medical problems ruled out.
Theoretically, one should be able to get ‘really hard’ at any hour of
the day (given that you are well rested, have not had sex for 48 hours and have
had enough stimulation), so it is a little concerning that you are having
difficulties.
With
that being said, my second hunch is that because you are new to sex you simply
might have unrealistic expectations about what your penis can and can not do.
After ejaculation all men have a ‘refractory period’ where they
simply can not get hard again. This period lasts anywhere from one minute to 48
hours. You also may not be receiving enough stimulation to warrant a hard as
rock penis. Do you only experience waxing and waning when you are with
your girlfriend? Or does this also occur when you masturbate? If you experience
this problem when you are on your own, there is a greater chance that this is
not a relationship problem, but rather a medical one.
In
regards to taking supplements, unless they are prescribed by your doctor stay
away from them. If you absolutely
require having a ‘hard as rock’ penis, try using a dildo harness
http://www.howtohavegoodsex.com/dildo_harness.htm
In
regards to what exercises you can do. Try
strengthening your PC muscles http://www.howtohavegoodsex.com/locating_your_pc_muscle.htm
Alex
Robboy, LSW
HTHGS:
Limp Penis (written by Alex Robboy, LSW)
Ask
Alex
I'm 24yrs old. I think I have a problem and would appreciate any feedback
you can give me. In short, my problem is that I cannot get a really hard
erection during the day or at night. When I wake up in the mornings, my
penis is as hard as a rock and stands up real stiff, and sex at that time is
just fantastic for myself and my girlfriend. But at other times, it just
does not harden up well. My girlfriend gives me a hand job and I come, but
my penis is not hard enough for intercourse. Oral sex is great, but I want
to know why I cannot maintain an erection at times other than first thing in the
morning. Is there any exercise I can do? Any supplements I can take?
Anything? Please let me know. Thank you, Yours Sincerely, Mark
Dear
Mark,
The first thing you need to do is make an appointment with your urologist for a
medical check-up to ensure that the problems that you are experiencing are not
medically related. As a rule of
thumb, waking up with a firm erection is a contra-indication of an erectile
dysfunction due to medical problems. However, this is not always the case,
therefore, I highly recommend making an appointment.
From
what you wrote, I am wondering if you have difficulties maintaining an erection
when you masturbate? In other words does this problem always occur? Or is it
related to the person that you are with? Sometimes men have difficulties having
a firm penis when they get anxious about their performance? Other times, they do
not know how to teach the woman they are with how to please them.
In regards to taking supplements, unless they are
doctor prescribed, I would avoid them. All medications have side-effects.
Generally speaking, you are better off strengthening your PC muscles http://www.howtohavegoodsex.com/locating_your_pc_muscle.htm
or learning how to focus on all the other parts of sex.
Anyone who thinks great sex is just about penile-vaginal intercourse is
missing out. Great sex requires a
combination of imagination, fantasy, experimentation and a love of the whole
body!
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