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Past Tips


No sex drive
(How to have good sex)


HTHGS: No sex drive (written by Dr. Erika Pluhar)

Ask Dr. Erika,
I am recently married, 21 yr old female, who has never been with anyone else but doesn't seem to have the desire for sex.  My husband and I are very frustrated.  I take Paxil cr 25mg for anxiety and Levora birth control.  He is enjoying sex but I am not.  Please help us.  It is annoying to not want sex at all when I have waited so long to do it with the person I love.  Thank you Md

Dear Md.
Thank you for your question. I hear that you are frustrated and commend you for writing in with your question. From the information you provided, my first thought is that your sexual desire has been affected by the medication you are taking. One of the side effects of Paxil is a decrease in sexual desire or arousal. Did you notice a change when you started taking Paxil? How would you describe your level of desire before starting? Before your marriage? One thing you might do is talk with your doctor and/or mental health care provider about the possibility of switching to a different medicine that doesn't have as many sexual side effects. I wish you the best. Sincerely, Dr. Erika Pluhar



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The Founder: "Alex" Caroline Robboy, LCSW, QSW, CAS

Ms. Robboy is the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of The Center for Growth Inc and How To Have Good Sex Inc.  Alex practices marriage and family therapy and sex therapy, and also conducts periodic seminars about human sexuality throughout the northeastern United States.

Ms. Robboy graduated from the University of Pennsylvania where she earned a Masters degree in Social Work, a Certificate of Advanced Studies in Human Sexuality Education and a Post-Masters Certificate in Marriage Counseling & Sex Therapy. Through the American Board of Sexology, she is a board certified sexologist and through the American Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists a certified sex therapist.  Additionally, she is a licensed clinical social worker and a member of the American Board of Marriage and Family Therapy.


  Our Philosophy sex is like dancing, it changes every time. It depends on culture, atmosphere and mood. Sometimes it is done alone, with a partner or in a group. It can be fast and hard or slow and soft. Sex is a combination of non-verbal negotiation and verbal cues: a scream, a twitch of the toes, or a flush of the face. There is no one 'right' way to move, only what feels good to all those involved. 
     The purpose of this site is to share information. Thus, if you have any ideas, thoughts or information that you believe others might benefit from, please e-mail your tip to and I  will be sure to include it on either our weekly newsletter or here on the actual website. 

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September 6, 2006